I fall into the category of those vertically challenged. They found out I stopped growing when I was in 7th grade. That's just when they found out. It's quite possible my growth ended somewhere around third grade which is a more logical explanation for my current measurements.
I like being short because I get attention for it - negative and positive - and I enjoy attention. However, there are many daily activities that are much harder for us in the short club compared to you people in the average height category.
For example, unless I sit up absolutely straight I can't touch the floor while sitting at my desk. So, I am forced to curl my feet underneath me and sit on them (my most frequent pose) or sit Indian style. Both involve me taking off my shoes which is one of the first things I do in the morning after I check my work e-mail.
Other woes:
- I can't reach the the pedals on my car when I am wearing flip-flops so I have to shift with my tippy toes. This is bad for non-accident driving because the pedals get stuck between my toes and the shoe leaving me forever stuck in second gear.
- I can't reach my kitchen cabinets so I have a cooler that always sits in my kitchen that I can use to step onto the counter to get a glass or tupperware.
- If my smoke detector battery gets low and starts beeping, I have to get a chair and then stack books and magazines on it until I can reach.
- On airplanes, I usually have to ask someone to put my suitcase up in the overhead bin. I have yet to be sitting next to someone cute and not middle aged that will do this.
- I spend a lot of money with the alterations lady. On the upside, when I was getting Prom dresses I could always get whatever dress I wanted because they would make it fit by eliminating a lot of fabric.
- Being short makes you look round, hence the annoying nickname of "short round." I am not round but the potential is definitely there because short people don't have as much room to put the pizza they had at midnight.
- Nicknames like Midget, Midge, Short Round, Shorty, Little one.
It's been a long, long, long, long, long time...
9 years ago
4 comments:
I had no idea about the problems with reaching the pedals. Remind me to drive the next time we go somewhere together.
Just an update: Vern the Fern has been growing a lot lately. He is WAY bigger than you now.
Also, I think you should get a step ladder. Standing on books and magazines on a chair is never the safest way to do anything.
Finally, you should start flying only Southwest. Even though they are the crappiest airline in the US, and I would rather just stay home than ever fly anywhere using them, the do let you pick your own seat. This allows the non-married people to pick and choose whose lap they will spend the next few hours sitting on. I've heard that wearing whorish amounts of makeup aids in the process.
I feel your short pain. I do. Just maybe not to the extent that you feel it.
i stumbled upon your blog and couldn't help but comment...
as a (fellow) short girl, i can sympathize with everything you said!
Post a Comment